How can we be allies and how can we help others be allies to us? Here are the results of the discussions around developing ally relationships for Michigan Tech and the local community.
GLBT break-out group response to the question:
“What would I like to see,hear, have done (or not done) in this community that would make my experience here better?”
People should ask questions
If you don't want to offend, start the question with “I don't want to offend, but I was wondering...” Always better to ask than to be ignorant.
Use more inclusive languageUse 'partner' instead of wife, husband, girlfriend, or boyfriend, etc. We'd like to be officially recognized.
Encourage diversity training.Videos and books on GLBT are available in the MTU library as well as the lending library in the Affirmative Programs office. Have administrators attend events, especially high level persons.
Be Willing to interveneRe: comments using terms like "fag" and derogatory lines like "that's so gay".
Don't act like I have "cooties".You can not catch what I've got. People are born this way.
Ask yourself, "Why do I feel uncomfortable?"It might mean you need more good information and less misinformation.
Show support by attending events.On November 19, Transgender Day of Remembrance.
Make an obvious show of your support.
Don't assume we know you support us.
Wear ribbons or buttons like ones that say, "Straight, not narrow."
See a group member to get buttons, or check Keweenaw Pride's website.
Don't be afraid of being the minority. Attend other events like the Muslin Student Events. Get out of your comfort zone.
Be willing to learn.Take a risk to talk and bring up a charged topic.
Don't assume all materials are the truth. Learn more.
We sometimes mix up the order of our letters in the acronym and add an "A" for Ally to demonstrate the diversity within our group.
There are many like me who make a conscious decision to want to know more. To communicate with others in the GLBT community would help. Learn from where you are. People can e-mail presidents of student organizations with questions about their group or can go to their web sites.
My learning is incremental. Once when I was younger I attended an event where a woman said she did not focus on who was loving who, but that it was important for someone to be loving someone. That helped a lot to frame it.
Build on small incremental changes, like say "Partner" from now on. Then go to confronting homo jokes. Then attend more events and workshops.
Don't assume we all know each other. If you meet someone who is out be careful not to drop names of others you think or know as GLBT. You might out someone who is not ready.
“What would I like to see,hear, have done (or not done) in this community that would make my experience here better?”
People should ask questions
If you don't want to offend, start the question with “I don't want to offend, but I was wondering...” Always better to ask than to be ignorant.
Use more inclusive language
Encourage diversity training.
Be Willing to intervene
Don't act like I have "cooties".
Ask yourself, "Why do I feel uncomfortable?"
Show support by attending events.
Don't be afraid of being the minority.
Be willing to learn.
Don't assume all materials are the truth. Learn more.
We sometimes mix up the order of our letters in the acronym and add an "A" for Ally to demonstrate the diversity within our group.
There are many like me who make a conscious decision to want to know more. To communicate with others in the GLBT community would help. Learn from where you are. People can e-mail presidents of student organizations with questions about their group or can go to their web sites.
My learning is incremental. Once when I was younger I attended an event where a woman said she did not focus on who was loving who, but that it was important for someone to be loving someone. That helped a lot to frame it.
Build on small incremental changes, like say "Partner" from now on. Then go to confronting homo jokes. Then attend more events and workshops.
Don't assume we all know each other. If you meet someone who is out be careful not to drop names of others you think or know as GLBT. You might out someone who is not ready.